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^please don't give these associations any more ideas.
I am one of three members on my HOA's board of directors. Not by my wish. At the annual meeting, they couldn't get anyone to volunteer, and I owed a favor to one of the existing board members, so she called in the chip...I was shanghai'd. To add insult to injury, in our HOA, the board members are elected without role assignment, the board itself decides which board member will occupy which position (prez, VP, and secretary/treasurer). The other two board members elected me as the secretary/treasurer...so I end up doing 75% of the board's work. Whine, whine, whimper, snivel, ...sigh.

I took a snapshot of that cartoon and sent it to the other board members and also to members of the ACC (the much-dreaded architectural control committee). In less than 12 hours, I've received responses from all of them -- unanimous shout of joyful acclamation. So at least, amid the administrative quagmire, there is still a sense of humor.
 

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A retired army officer told of once having to submit a list of flowers he wanted to plant at his on base housing. Wondering if such things were even read, he put his degree in botany to use and listed the full Latin names of 6 or 8 plants.
In due time his list came back marked approved, but he never planted anything on his list. But he was approved to plant opium poppies, marijuana, ...
...poison ivy, skunk-weed, kudzu, dandelions, Russian knapweed, .... :p
 

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Anybody interested in a free ride in a helicopter flight for 4 people?! I'm still looking for 2 more people to join us. We leave early Saturday (October 24th) morning from Warm Springs Ga , and will fly to St. Augustine Fl where we will have breakfast and then on a yacht for lunch.
Then we’ll do a flight along the coast to see The Jacksonville, FL port and returning to St Augustine for dinner, then fly back home.
If interested please pm me..
Preferably someone with a helicopter and yacht, otherwise we can't go.
 

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Anybody interested in a free ride in a helicopter flight for 4 people?! I'm still looking for 2 more people to join us. We leave early Saturday (October 24th) morning from Warm Springs Ga , and will fly to St. Augustine Fl where we will have breakfast and then on a yacht for lunch.
Then we’ll do a flight along the coast to see The Jacksonville, FL port and returning to St Augustine for dinner, then fly back home.
If interested please pm me..
Preferably someone with a helicopter and yacht, otherwise we can't go.
That sounds lovely, but darn it, they're both in the shop. Can we go in my '73 Pinto and wooden rowboat instead?
 

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The judge had not yet put in an appearance in the San Diego traffic court. When the bailiff entered the courtroom, he sensed the nervousness of the traffic offenders awaiting their ordeal.

"Good morning, ladies and gentlemen," he said. "Welcome to 'What's My Fine?' "
 

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This is the type of thing that the onion would put out, but it came from a presumably university educated bureaucrat with a good government salary and pension...



mask.JPG
 

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A senior driver was stopped by a cop at 1 am for driving on two lanes.
Cop: Where are you driving at this late hour?
Driver: To a lecture on the effects of drinking on your body.
Cop: and who's giving such a lecture this late?
Driver: My wife.
 

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During a lesson about adjectives, my friend, an elementary school teacher, asked her class to describe their mothers.

One boy described his mother's hair as auburn.

Impressed by his sophisticated word choice, my friend asked, "How do you know her hair color is auburn?"

Her student replied, "Because that's what it says on the box."
 

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This man goes to his long time barber.
Man: Can you cut more on my right side than the left side, then cut more on the left back side than the right side, then cut a big tunnel in the middle?
Barber: You know I can't do that!
Man: Well, you did it last time...
 

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The homework assignment for my Spanish class was to write a paragraph.
When I returned their papers, I asked one student if he had used Google Translate or any other online translator to write his paper.

He categorically denied doing so.

That led to my next question:


“Then why is this in French?”
 
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