Story Time: Construction Mishaps! - Off Topic - DIY Chatroom Home Improvement Forum

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Old 11-30-2011, 10:30 AM   #1
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Story time: Construction Mishaps!

Hi! - Y'all!!
This is in the 1980's
I'm doing a "side-job" for a friend - Addison, Ill.
Aluminum soffit and fascia, wrap all the window and door trim, rehang the
exterior doors (they Really! needed it!), new gutters (.032 - K5).
I'm working on it Sat. and Sun. - when I can get there.

I've come in very, reasonable on price - just trying to make a little "cash"!
I've been there on Sat. - made good progress (looking at the very, end of the job!
Sat. night - a friend of ours is celebrating his birthday - we're all there.
At this time I'm pretty, much imbibing "Chateau", "Lite" - a very, fine,
drinkable "brew"; also, known as "Miller Lite"!
(Probably, vintage - 2 days ago!!)
It's a party, Yeah, shots start flying around, caution is thrown to the wind!
I have some shots with my friends! (Oops!)

Sun. morning up at the "crack" of headache!
I'm severely, hung-over!
However, being the "glluton" (forgive the spelling) for punishment that I
am - I'm off to Addison.
(What a good little, "trooper"!)
Remember, I'm looking at the end of this job - pay day!!

I'm up on a roof 5/12 - 6/12; nothing scary!
I've got a 6 ft. aluminum, step ladder against the house (No problem!)
I'm trying to do the "wrap" on the top of a window.
Can't get the "wrap" to clear the step-ladder.
So, I'm "bouncing" the ladder off the side of the house (Brilliant!)
I bounce the ladder a little too hard.

Down I go - Double bag, 4 pockets each bag (loaded - old, heavy, cordless
drill in the pouch)!
I'd just installed the new gutters (Don't want to damage them!!!!!)
As I pass by the gutter (on the way to the ground) - I've got gloves on -
and I briefly, grab the gutter to make sure I'm straight up!
(I could have hung on to that gutter and done a "hang drop" - I was
worried about damaging the gutter - what a "trooper"!!)

The journey (I like that band!) was uneventful - the "meeting" with the
asphalt driveway was (1/2 - 2 stories) - "eventful"!
(Luckily, the driveway stopped my fall - I might have ended up in China!!)
I'm laying on the driveway, tied up with this ladder, laughing -
what a stupid, fool!!!

My friend comes out and asks me if I'm OK - of course!
(No mere, driveway is going to get the "better" of me!!!)
I work for an hour or so, longer - the "PAIN" starts to set in!!
I tell my friend - I think I fall down go boom!
No problems!!

I leave, and drive myself home - the pain is getting increasingly, excrutiating. (spelling?).
My feet REALLY, REALLY, hurt!!
"ER" trip.
I take a bath to clean myself up - clean skin in casts.
Off I go to the "ER" - Edwards Hospital, Naperville.

I get there, and check in - wait for about an hour - a doctor can see you.
Tell the doctor what happened - X-Rays on my feet.
Fractured both of my heals! (I do good work! - no "messing around"!)
We discuss whether or not they should be "casted" - he says,
not really necessary - you just wouldn't be able to walk for 3 to 4 months.

I get a "script" for some "pain-killers" - I go home.
I don't like "pain-killers" - I've got a bottle of Scotch and some "greenish",
spurious, stuff at home!!
Self-medication ensues!!!
(I've got a REAL, excuse now!)

I'm walking (sort of) in a month - (topical, application of "pain-killers")
The "moral" of this story?
"Morals", "Morality", "Ethics"??? What???!
Don't fall off of a roof!!!!

In the end - I got better!!!
("Nasty Bits" removed to protect the "frail sensibilities"!! of the "viewers"!)

(No asphalt was harmed in the production of this story!)

As always -

Happy Holidays!


(Don't worry (Be Happy!) - there's more "fun" and "mishaps" waiting!!)


Last edited by rossfingal; 11-30-2011 at 10:34 AM.
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