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Old 02-12-2014, 01:06 PM   #106
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A few jokes...


Some timely advice for the Olympic participants!
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Old 02-12-2014, 03:02 PM   #107
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A few jokes...


"I'm walking in a Winter Wonderland!!"
Things are pretty, cold and frozen around here -
didn't think it would get this extreme!!!
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Old 02-12-2014, 03:32 PM   #108
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Brrrrrrrrrrr!
That makes me "chilly"!!!
How 'bout a heart-warming pic, of our X-Mas tree!?!
(Nothing like the fragrance of pine!)
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Old 02-12-2014, 06:16 PM   #109
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A few jokes...


Quote:
Originally Posted by rossfingal View Post
Down with that! - Jim and Judy!

Now; for something completely different -

Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community. The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71. Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth , Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch. The gravesite was piled high with flours.

Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Born and bread in Minnesota, Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes. Despite being a little flaky at times, he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, three children: John Dough, Jane Dough and Dosey Dough, plus they had a bun in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart. The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

If you smiled while reading this, please rise to the occasion and pass it on to someone having a crumby day and kneading a lift.

Too funny! Laughed out loud at this one. Thanks!
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Old 02-12-2014, 06:20 PM   #110
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A "sign" of the times?
Boooo to that! Not sure if that is a real sign somewhere. If it is shame on them! Thanks for posting.
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Old 02-12-2014, 06:22 PM   #111
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Happy Birthday February babies! My oldest "baby" turned 34 on the 6th. Boy do I feel old! Lol
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Old 02-12-2014, 08:07 PM   #112
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No need to thank me -
it's good to make people smile!

"sign" - probably a "Photoshop" job -
(Hope so!)

Happy B'Day to your "baby!

(All the best people are born early in Feb!)
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Old 02-13-2014, 06:25 AM   #113
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Wives never forget their old boy friends


Husband took the wife to a disco dance hall on the weekend.

There was a guy on the dance floor giving it his all....

large leaps, breakdancing, moonwalking, back flips, the works!

The wife turned to husband and said: "See that guy?

30 years ago he proposed to me and I turned him down."

Husband says: "Looks like he's STILL celebrating"!!!

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Old 02-13-2014, 06:33 AM   #114
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rossfingal View Post
No need to thank me -
it's good to make people smile!

"sign" - probably a "Photoshop" job -
(Hope so!)

Happy B'Day to your "baby!

(All the best people are born early in Feb!)
Aww thanks! I'll let him know a birthday wish was sent his way. I just missed being a February baby. My birthday is the 30th of January. Lol
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Old 02-13-2014, 06:59 AM   #115
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It doesn't matter what day you were born!
All that matters is -
You were born!!!

Now...
Let's talk about "Zombies"!

A few days ago -
I almost got run over by a person "texting" while they were driving.
Grrrrrrrr!
Stupid*&*^%$#@*ing Idiots!!!

Here's an example of "Zombies" -
(They probably, all know each other - but why actually, talk to each
other when you can "Text" them?!?)
Huh?!?
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Old 02-13-2014, 07:57 AM   #116
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A sweet old lady telephoned St. Joseph's Hospital. She timidly asked, "Is it possible to speak to someone who can tell me how a patient is doing?"

The operator said, "I can, what's the name and room number?"

The old lady in her weak voice said, "Thelma Brown, room 108."

The operator replied, "Let me place you on hold while I check with her nurse."

After a few minutes the operator returned to the phone and said, "Oh, I have good news, her nurse just told me that Thelma is doing very well. Her blood pressure is fine; her blood work just came back as normal and her physician, Dr, Cole, has scheduled her to be discharged on Monday."

The old lady said, "Thank you. That's wonderful! I was so worried! God bless you!"

The operator replied, "You're more than welcome. Is Thelma your daughter?"'

The little old lady said, "No, I'm Thelma Brown in 108. No one tells me anything."
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Old 02-13-2014, 08:21 AM   #117
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Strange - but, true!!!

(I speak from experience!)

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Old 02-13-2014, 08:41 AM   #118
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A few jokes...


Now -
On an "Ironic" note -
It's "ironic" how much irony you run into, in the world
Some, "ironic" examples -
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Old 02-13-2014, 08:55 AM   #119
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A few jokes...


More "irony"!
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Old 02-13-2014, 09:42 AM   #120
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Fear?!?

As Winston Churchill said -
We have nothing to fear - but, fear itself!
Here's "fear"! -
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