want to get stoned
Either man made stone veneer or real stone thin cut veneer. Cheesy is being too nice about anything that you will find in sheets.
Some of the man mades are pretty convincing, depending on manufacturer and type of stone you are trying to mimic.
Pay particular attention to properly flashing the top, bottom, and corners, or water intrusion will cause big problems.
Beside the cost of the real stone, you will have to provide a solid footing to support it, as you cannnot just support it from the wall framing like one of the veneers
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